PRIYANKA'S MEOW

ARVIND K.PANDEY

NEWSPAPER RUN BY SEMI-LITERATE WOMEN

The semi-literate group of women in Bundelkhand is today a force to reckon with . These women have managed to run a Bundelkhandi newspaper Khabar Laharia , to provide a voice to the weaker section of society . The newspaper is making waves in the region . It's worthwhile as well as surprising since none of them have even an iota of knowledge about the trend patterns and intricacies associated with journalism , forget about having a degree in journalism from a premier institute . Their success story is indicative of fact that it's spirit and not degree which places one on the road to achievement .

PRIYANKA : Either the journalists are running after movie stars or are too eager to share the platform with neta ...MEOW..MEOW

TOMMY : These women are better than ones who are writing trash after getting a degree from so-called premier instituions ..BOW..BOW

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Prafulla: Do you know the three words that an ignorant person says most often?

Anand: I don’t know.

Prafulla: Right

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WHEN A CAT ELOPES

" A GIRL HAS A RIGHT IN THIS COUNTRY TO ELOPE " -SUPREME COURT

(THE TELEGRAPH 24 NOVEMBER , 2007)

PRIYANKA : Life becomes hellish once a cat elopes . There may be exceptions but usually it's " Char Din Ki Chadani Phir Andheri Raat " ...MEOW..MEOW

TOMMY : There is no merit in eloping since vultures in human form are everywhere ..BOW..BOW

KALU : A doggie might have a fresh beginning once he returns back after running away from home . However , the life becomes more darker for cats on their return . ....MEOW..MEOW

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Priyanka: Sonu, do you say your prayers before eating?

Ankur: I don’t have to. My mother is quite a good cook .

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Deepak: Tina, what would happen if the earth rotated 30 times faster?

Vivek: I don’t know.

Deepak: We would get our salary every day.

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SENSEX MAN

I found the photograph you showed of Shahrukh Khan in the story, Ab-solutely Shahrukh (Oct 22), nauseating. It was disgusting to see the torso of a cine actor look more like that of a rickshaw-wallah—one that’s moulded more by starvation that by sessions at the gym. It’s nothing except luck that is making srk big. We have had such stars in the past as well—Rajendra Kumar, Jeetendra and Asha Parekh to mention a few. Today they are all forgotten. Like them, some ten years from now, srk too will be consigned to the dustbin of Bollywood history.

Adi Katrak, Mumbai .

(A letter published in OUTLOOK )

TOMMY : SOME PEOPLE REFUSE TO BELIEVE THAT THEIR TIME IS OVER . YOU CAN FIND MANY EXAMPLES IN THE FIELD OF CRICKET AND MOVIE ...BOW ...BOW

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Nitin: Tell me what time it is.

Servant: I don’t know how to tell the time, sir.

Nitin: Just tell me where the large hand and the small hand are.

Servant: They are both inside the clock, sir.

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NO TRACE OF LOVE BIRD

Tommy , Kaluy , Moti and Sheru are most dissapointed figures today . Once they overheard this casual remark from a dirty outspoken doggie that " Pyar Naam Ki Chidiya Is Jamanein Se Phurra Ho Gayein Hai ." .The remark infuriated them , leading to a furious hunt for the bird representing true love . Now after so many years , having travelled in so many countries with a net bought with borrowed money , they have given up . Their net is now being given new shape by the rats .

MORAL OF THE STORY :

True love no more exists in this world . Love is now amalgam of carnal instincts and money

MOTI : Chalo Achha Hua Pyar Naam Ki Chidiya Is Jamanein Se Phurra Ho Gayein ...BOW..BOW

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Priyanka: This saree is very pretty but there is one problem with it.

Salesman: What?

Priyanka: The design is defective at some places.

Salesman: Don’t worry about that. The design will come off after the first wash

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AGGRESSIVE MARKETING

The hype surrounding OM SHANTI OM and SAAWARIA confirms the fact that in today's world if you have money , then be sure that aggressive marketing is there to make donkey look like horse .

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SONGS RELATED WITH LOVE'S LOVE AND HATE RELATIONSHIP WITH MONEY :

1 . Chaandi Ke Deewar Na Todi ...

Movie : Vishwas ; Music : Kalyanji Anandji ; Lyrics : Gulshan Bawra

2. Koi Chandi Ke Dilwaala ...

Movie : Maya(1961) ; Music : Salil Chowdhury ; Lyrics : Majrooh

3. Sona Nahi Chaandi Nahi Yaar To Mila ..

Movie : Saheb ; Music : Bappi Lahiri

4 . Kahein Paisein Pe Itna Guroor Katein Hai..

Movie : Laawaris ; Music : Kalyanji Anandji

5.Thoda Hai Thodein Ki Jaroorat Hai ...

Movie : Khatta Meetha ; Music : Rajesh Roshan ; Lyrics : Gulzar

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JOKES BORROWED FROM TT